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Pig

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A couple drove several miles down a country road, not saying a word. An earlier discussion had led to an argument, and neither wanted to concede their position. As they passed a barnyard of mules and pigs, the wife sarcastically asked, "Relatives of yours?" "Yep," the husband replied, "In-laws."

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Laughter File

Submitted by :Dave T
Category : Insults
Date Added : 22/10/2005
Rated : 390

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Bonus Joke - 'twas The Night Before Finals

T'was the night before finals, And all through the college, The students were praying For last minute knowledge.

Most were quite sleepy, But none touched their beds, While visions of essays Danced in their heads.

Out in the taverns, A few were still drinking, And hoping that liquor Would get their brains thinking.

In my own apartment, I had been pacing, Dreading all those exams I soon would be facing.

My roommate was speechless, His nose in his books, And my comments to him Drew unfriendly looks.

I drained all the coffee, And brewed a new pot, No longer caring That my nerves were shot.

I stared at my notes, But my thoughts were all muddy, My eyes went a'blur, I just couldn't study.

"Some pizza might help," I said with a shiver, But each place I called Refused to deliver.

I'd pretty much concluded Life is unfair and cruel, Since our futures all depend On grades made in school.

When all of a sudden, Our door opened wide, And Patron Saint Put-It-Off Ambled inside.

Her spirit was careless, Her manner was mellow, She looked at the mess And started to bellow:

"Why should us students Make such a fuss, About what those teachers Toss out to us?"

"On Cliff Notes! On Crib Notes! On Last Year's Exams! On Wingit and Slingit, And Last Minute Crams!"

Her message delivered, She vanished from sight, But we heard her laughing Outside in the night.

"Your teachers won't flunk you, So just do your best. Happy Finals to All, And to All, a good test."

Submitted by : M Magic



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