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Smart Blonde

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The local sheriff was looking for a deputy, so a blonde went in to try out for the job. "Okay," the sheriff drawled, "what is 1 and 1?"
"Eleven," she replied.

The sheriff thought to himself, "That's not what I meant, but she's right." "What two days of the week start with the letter 'T'?"

"Today and tomorrow."

He was again surprised that the blonde supplied a correct answer that he had never thought of himself.

"Now, listen carefully: Who killed Abraham Lincoln?"

The blonde looked a little surprised herself, then thought really hard for a minute and finally admitted, "I don't know."

"Well, why don't you go home and work on that one for a while?"

So, the blonde wandered over to the beauty parlor, where her pals were waiting to hear the results of the interview. The blonde was exultant. "It went great! First day on the job and I'm already working on a murder case!"

Laughter File

Submitted by :Jokerman
Category : Blonde jokes
Date Added : 22/10/2005
Rated : 1025

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Bonus Joke - 'twas The Night Before Finals

T'was the night before finals, And all through the college, The students were praying For last minute knowledge.

Most were quite sleepy, But none touched their beds, While visions of essays Danced in their heads.

Out in the taverns, A few were still drinking, And hoping that liquor Would get their brains thinking.

In my own apartment, I had been pacing, Dreading all those exams I soon would be facing.

My roommate was speechless, His nose in his books, And my comments to him Drew unfriendly looks.

I drained all the coffee, And brewed a new pot, No longer caring That my nerves were shot.

I stared at my notes, But my thoughts were all muddy, My eyes went a'blur, I just couldn't study.

"Some pizza might help," I said with a shiver, But each place I called Refused to deliver.

I'd pretty much concluded Life is unfair and cruel, Since our futures all depend On grades made in school.

When all of a sudden, Our door opened wide, And Patron Saint Put-It-Off Ambled inside.

Her spirit was careless, Her manner was mellow, She looked at the mess And started to bellow:

"Why should us students Make such a fuss, About what those teachers Toss out to us?"

"On Cliff Notes! On Crib Notes! On Last Year's Exams! On Wingit and Slingit, And Last Minute Crams!"

Her message delivered, She vanished from sight, But we heard her laughing Outside in the night.

"Your teachers won't flunk you, So just do your best. Happy Finals to All, And to All, a good test."

Submitted by : M Magic